Roller Paradise

Give me a new pair of rollers on my feet, MY music blaring in my ears, a sunny warm day outside and the streets of Paris and I am in paradise!!!

The happiest moments of my life are when I'm on rollers. Now even more so than before. I get the speed, danger and power all at once. I've always felt, somehow, that rollers (skates or inlines) were an extension of my feet and my body and that I am completely in control. In comparison I've always felt less in control with skateboards, bicycles and cars as there's always some other piece of equipment "outside" of me. Either way it is always a wonderful feeling for me to be on rollers and feel completely in control of myself and my body and just plain having fun.

After this summer I realised that I was going to have to get new rollers. My old ones were about 4 years old, had done literally hundreds of kilometres and they were starting to give me a rash above my ankles each time I wore them. Today is really one of the first days when I knew it was going to be nice out all day. I therefore headed out to Nomades to buy some new rollers and then try out the Sunday Roller Randonnée. Nomades normally has one of the largest selections of rollers in the Paris area. I was actually disappointed that all of the new "top of the range" rollers are made for 90 mm wheels. The larger wheels are great for speed and make going uphill easier. But the wheels stick out of the front and back of the skate. This makes slaloms and most tricks impossible. I like both speed and tricks. Those skates will not do. I therefore hit the mid-range skates with 80 mm to 84 mm wheels. I've always been a big fan of Salomon rollers as were all of the salesmen at Nomades. Unfortunately I just learned that Salomon no longer makes rollers. They are concentrating their business only on skis. I therefore had to look elsewhere. The Rollerblade rollers looked good and they had a very modern system of lacing up (mechanical pull laces made out of metal). But they were quite uncomfortable, difficult to get in and out of and my feet moved around in them too much. After trying 3 pairs I finally opted for a pair of K2 "Moto" rollers with 2 straps across the top for extra support.

Oh, while I was rushing off to catch up with the randonnée, which had left 5 minutes before, I briefly encountered David the roller instructor from Club Med Vittel. He was heading back in to the Nomades shop, where apparently he now works, and we had a lightening quick conversation. He left Club Med a year ago, is working full time at the shop, has some projects he's trying to "mount"... I will try and have lunch with him sometime in the near future to catch up.

Normally once you've done the Friday night roller randonnée you can't possibly go back to the Sunday Afternoon one. The lack of speed, the constant and very long breaks, the vast quantity and omnipresence of beginners makes all for a very frustrating experience. However it's been a long time since I've done the Friday night roller, I've gained a lot of weight, I'm not in great shape and I'm going to be wearing brand new rollers. I therefore reckoned this would be a good place to start. Were the constant and very long breaks frustrating? Damn straight! However they were also embarrassingly quite necessary. I needed to get my breath back as I would push myself pretty hard in between breaks, dancing and boogieing down the streets with my music in my ears. I was an absolute ball of sweat by the time we had the half-way break at Montparnasse. I have to admit that I am not ready to try the Friday night rando yet. I have desperately got to roller more and more often. I barely made it to the end. This wasn't because of exhaustion although that did make it difficult. I have come stupidly ill-prepared. I was wearing old thin socks. This was idiotic when buying new rollers. They were rubbing like crazy on the inside of my feet and, within about 45 minutes, I ended up with one huge blister, just underneath the inside ankle, on each foot which made movement quite painful. To top it off I had not quite gotten used to the lacing up methods and tightening methods on these new rollers. My feet were swelling up something awful and the balls of my feet were getting painful as well. I was sooo glad to take my rollers off at the break. At the end of the run, at Place Bastille, I took my rollers off, slide my sneakers back on (painfully) and tottered off to the métro to head home. I was literally having difficulty walking what with the combination of blisters and swollen soles. I made it home, rested with my feet up for a bit, had a shower and started dinner. Although exhausted and in relative pain in my feet I haven't felt this great in months!!!

I shouldn't forget... I am lucky...

Every now and then when I update my blog I click on to some of the other throat cancer or tonsil cancer links I have on the blog to see what's changed.

I found a very interesting article on Raph's Tonsil Cancer blog which I read through. If you have a chance please look at the article...

The Raph Stipic they refer to on page 61 is the creator of the blog described above. Raph's blog was the only one I found when I was diagnosed and he was an inspiration for me. Being able to read about his treatment, his pulling through, his trials and tribulations and most importantly the fact that he had made it back to a relatively normal life gave me a goal. I knew that if someone else out there could do it I could damn well make it myself. I only hope that my blog can be that helpful or inspirational for others some day.

The statistics on page 60 are particularly interesting. That's the first time I've ever noticed France as being the country with the largest population of oral and pharyngeal cancer victims.

The cisplatin they mention for chemotherapy is the same chemical I had for my injections. But instead of Erbitux I had 5-Fluorouracil in overnight pumps. I am learning more and more about the long-term effects of the chemo mixed with the radiation therapy and most of it ain't that positive.

But the main feeling I came away with after reading the article is the basic fact that I am lucky. Sure I've got a big scar on my neck. But that is literally nothing in comparison to many of the scars people diagnosed with the same type of cancer as mine have had to live with. Sure I have difficulty swallowing, tasting, screaming, singing and such. But that is a minor discomfort in comparison to many other similar cancer victims' handicaps. It is so easy to focus on what is not as it should boe or what is annoying. But the fact is all of it is relative and minor... I am a healthy, obsessive workaholic, healthy, relatively happy, healthy middle-aged man and very lucky to be here writing about it.

Super Bowl Monday

Slowly but surely recuperating from Super Bowl Sunday otherwise known as our annual Guys' Night Out. For more info as to what that entails check out last year's blog Entry or the year before's blog entry.

This year I was actually really rooting for a team as New York had made it to the Super Bowl. The New York Giants were clearly the underdogs facing the undefeated (18 wins and no losses in the entire season!) New England Patriots and I was actively rooting for New York...

We had a great time, and that's without the game, but we're starting to think of changing it up a bit for next year and doing things differently...

We arrived at American Dream at about 21:00 and the guys were all on time (again) this year. We first had to pay to go upstairs for dinner and the strippers. There are 3 fixed-price dinner/show menus (39 € for 2 courses (appetizer and main or main and dessert), 49 € for 3 course (appetizer, main and dessert) and 69 € for 3 courses plus an apéritif --- the choices of dishes are different for each menu as well). We were upset again as to how expensive this all was for what we knew was going to be worse than mediocre food and even less of a choice. We used to have a choice of the full American Dream menu and most of what we like isn't on these "show" menus. I miss my Philly Steak or Pastrami sandwich for example. We got upstairs, started with our first overpriced beers (7 € for 25 cl of beer is just plain silly... especially when you're going to be drinking for 7 hours!), and realised we were practically alone. One of the female strippers was up on the bar working her stuff in front of about 4 guys and the rest of the place was empty. She was wiping the poles and cleaning up more than anything else. We had our first 2 courses at the table and tried to cheer on the strippers who were pretty far away from us and up on the bar. Being the only ones cheering in the place made it strange for us and probably really boring and depressing for the strippers themselves. We can only imagine how the guy stripper must have felt each time he had to come out. Eventually we had dessert up at the bar to be closer to the "action" and it became more enjoyable as a few more guys came in towards the end. Both female strippers were completely "blown up" from their breasts to their lips to God only knows what else and known of my crowd of guy friends is attracted to that sort of thing. We all like our fantasies natural...

We were already, all 4 of us, talking about what we could do differently as of next year. Maybe have dinner beforehand, maybe go to a proper strip joint with a bit of excitement and class like Stringfellows, Hustler Club or Pink Paradise. Basically it's time to move up or move on or just plain change...

My best friend in the whole wide world, Robbie, actually left before the game. It was already great that he was able to tear himself away from home to come out and see us guys for a while. Robbie actually found a woman who finds him more than bearable {vbg}. He was therefore much more interested in getting home to his newfound female company than hanging out with the bunch of us middle-aged guys he sees every year...

After a relatively calm "show" we headed down to the basement to watch the match. The only places left were on the mezzanine, as usual for the past couple of years, and that meant having a horizontal bar from the fence pole directly in front of us throughout. It gets quite annoying after a while... Then in the 3rd quarter they shut down the basement and we all had to scramble upstairs to the ground floor and try and grab seats in front of the screen there. I was able to get a really good seat myself, albeit all on its own and I had to hold on to a vertical pole to look around, but the rest of the guys were spread around elsewhere which certainly took a lot away from the comraderie of the experience.

The game itself was an incredibly sharp contrast. The first half was one of the most boring Super Bowls in quite some time. The teams are very closely matched and it was more a defensive game than anything else. The very low score at the end of the first half was a good indicator: 3 points for New York and 7 points for New England. Half time was Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers which was a bit of a letdown. I would have preferred the pre-game show entertainer: Alicia Keys. But then came the second half. The third quarter definitely started getting interesting and we were particularly upset in having to move locations in the middle of the quarter which was certainly starting to heat up. The 4th quarter, and end of the game, was one of the most thrilling, suspenseful and exciting football game endings ever... let alone the fact that it was the Super Bowl! The last 3 minutes of play are going to become legendary... less than 3 minutes left to play and New York can now only win by getting a touchdown... they've been trying all night and have only gotten one in the whole game up till then... with less than a minute left to play New York scores an amazing touchdown!!! The bar/crowd goes wild!!! New England now have about 35 seconds to score a field goal to tie. New York turns up the heat with their defense and the game plays right down to 1 second left and New York holds their own and become Super Bowl champs!

I was jumping up and down and screaming to the best of my ability during that last touchdown along with just about every play leading up to it and following it. This was probably my first moment of frustration of the evening... I just can't scream any more... and when I try it sounds like a high-pitched wheezy smoker rather than the low-pitched rather masculine roar that I used to have. I miss my scream. But I still love trying!!! Everyone was excited at the bar and we were all talking about how amazing a game it was as we all poured out of the bar at 04:30 in the morning to head home.

Jean-Philippe was kind enough, yet again, to give me a lift home and we were talking in the car about other possibilities. Robbie had proposed that we watch the game next year at his house. This would obviously be more comfortable than the setup we've been through the past few years with American Dream.... But... above and beyonds our worries that we may keep Robbie's neighbours awake I have to admit that the ambiance and the energy of a bunch of us fans screaming together and excited together is an even more important and vital part of the game than the images on the screen(s) themselves. I'm not sure I'm willing to give up the audience-energy for the comforts of a home screening...

Right now my goal is to just make it through the day, which didn't start until after noon, and back to sleep to be recuperated, recharged and ready to work again tomorrow.

Until next year... Thank you New York Giants... Super Bowl Champions 2008!!!

Still young and cancer free!!!

Yet another exam...

I organised myself properly this time. I made the appointment towards the end of the day (around 16:00) so I was able to do some work in the morning and early afternoon. Brushed my teeth and popped my Xanax at 15:00 and was even a little early for my appointment so as not to be stressed out by parking and timing. I started relaxing myself as much as possible from 15:00 on...

He was a bit late, as usual, but it went well. The same exam as always. Now that I know what's coming and in what order it's sometimes easier and sometimes more difficult as I know what's next and I don't necessarily like it. As when I made it through the camera up through the left nostril and down the throat I knew that no matter what I was going to have to live through the right nostril as well. A few coughs and gags but overall it went well. The worst part is still when he holds my tongue with one hand, has me pant like a dog and then shoves his finger down my throat with the other hand. I still don't understand how I could ever possible do this one without gagging. But we got through it. He was actually pleased that it was "easier" than usual. Yeah... right... easier for him maybe.

The important part was afterwards. This was the first time I found myself able to look at the enormous video on the scrren of the insides of my throat. He explained that he was very pleased at the evolution and how few long-term bruises or scars I had internally. I was even more pleased than he to hear this. We then discussed my tongue which still has this fungus which comes and goes along the back of my tongue. He made sure it had not reached my digestive tract and we discussed various treatments. The difficulty is that it goes away and then, about a month later, it comes back. It never seems to go away permanently. He gave me some new treatments and we'll see.

The most important part of the whole process for me, aside from the wonderful declaration that as of this moment I am entirely cancer-free, is that we have now changed the frequency of these sadistic/masochistic visits. The first year it was every 3 months, the second year it was every 4 months and now that we're in the third year it's every 6 months and I don't have to see him again until July. I told him that it's not that it's not a pleasure to see him.. but... it's really not a pleasure to see him. He understood.

I came home and went to sleep for a few hours and felt groggy for the rest of the evening. A couple of episodes of West Wing and off to bed.

Yet another minute of fame

This actually happened a few days ago but the show was broadcast today. As many of you may already know I am a big fan of Tech Podcasts in general and Digital Planet in particular. I generally download this to my iPod and listen to it in the car when travelling back and forth to clients'. When I started playing around with Facebook, about a year ago, I noticed they had a system for creating discussion groups and there weren't any dedicated to my favourite show. I therefore created the Digital Planet Listeners' Group on Facebook. This was mostly an experiment to see how these groups worked on Facebook in comparison to electronic groups I already work with and managed on Yahoo and Google. It actually turned out to be quite fun and caught on quite quickly.

One of the really fun aspects of this group is that the presenter of the programme,
Gareth Mitchell, joined and even uploaded his photo. It was actually quite a strange experience to finally see what he looked like. I had been listening to his programme regularly for about a year by then and had developed a blurry idea in my head as to what he looks like. Of course he looks nothing like my idea. This was driven home even more strongly when his co-presenter, Bill Thomson joined the group and put his photo up as well. He looks nothing like I imagined!

Just last week, all of a sudden and from out of nowhere, I get an e-mail from Gareth Mitchell. They're doing a story on the programme which he thinks is relevant to our Facebook group and he wants to interview me for the programme. Luckily it was an e-mail and not a phone conversation as I probably would have fainted. I was a bit leary remembering my last experience with BBC radio and how my replies were taken completely out of context and with new voiceovers. But I felt almost as though I know Gareth and could trust him. We wrote back and forth for a while and finally set up the interview using Skype. I was first impressed with the quality of the sound over Skype and then realised just how strange it was to hear Gareth Mitchell's voice coming through my telephone. It's like listening to the radio in the telephone. It was very strange. The interview itself was absolutely perfect and went very well. I then had to wait several days for the programme to be broadcast and then uploaded as a podcast.

Finally it was released and there was a mention on their web site. I immediately downloaded the Podcast, listened through and was actually quite pleased. He used our interview exactly as it happened. No extra comments, no out of context mixing, no superfluous editing. It sounded just like our conversation. Agree or don't agree with what I have to say... that's not important. Let me express myself frankly and honestly without modification is. I played around with the MP3 file and came up with a smaller (1 minute) version you can download.

The Rack

Several weeks ago I bought a new computer rack (off of eBay for only 50 Euros!) to reorganise all my equipment in the computer room / laundry room. As I was going to be taking all of the equipment out to put the rack in, and then filling the rack, Desney decided that the room had to be redone (cracks filled; frames cemented; floor, walls and ceiling painted, ...). For weeks now Desney's been working evenings, holidays, weekends and even taking some time off work to finish the room. It's finished and it looks great!

Last weekend we were finally ready to put the rack in the room. The end result was quite painful!. I've been paying the price in pain ever since.


The last part of the installation was to rewire all of the Ethernet cables for the new placement of all of the equipment in the rack. Everything fits in nicely now and I'm very pleased with, and actually quite proud of, the end result.

For those of you who are interested in this sort of thing here's the inventory from the top shelf down:

• 16-socket Cat6 RJ45 wiring frame


• 16-socket Cat6 RJ45 wiring frame


• NetGear GS724T 24-port Gigabit managed switch


• NetGear GS724T 24-port Gigabit managed switch


• Cable modems for cable Internet connection and cable telephone connection


• Buffalo Terastation II Pro
  1 terabyte network disk
  All of our music is on this disk and accessed through our Sonos players throughout the house


• Iomega NetDisk
  250 gigabyte network disk
  The onsite backup of our server is on this disk


• Dell PowerEdge 400SC
  Our home file server
  (getting old --- to be replaced sometime soon)


• Seagate 500 GB external disk
  This is connected to the music server and holds the other copy of our music collection


• Dell OptiPlex GX520
  This is our music server and distributes music to the Squeezeboxes in the girls' bedrooms


• APC BackUPS ES 700 & APC BackUPS ES 500
  Uninterruptible Power Supplies
  These protect our peripherals from power cuts


• APC SmartUPS 1500 RM
  Uninterruptible Power Supply
  This is connected to the file server, the Terastation and the Switches to keep everything running during a power cut and with remote management


• Hidden on the top of the rack is the Siemens wireless phone which distributes the cable phone to the other 5 telephone handsets around the house and a NetGear DG834N wireless router which distributes the cable Internet connection to the network (the ADSL Internet connection is distributed via the router in my office).

What can I say? A Geek's paradise!!!

A pain in the back...

Desney's been working on the laundry/computer room for weeks. She's been repairing walls, floors, filling-in holes and painting days and nights for weeks to get it up and running and ready.

All this because I got a new computer rack, off of eBay, and I took all of the computer equipment out of the room to put the rack in. I got the rack several weeks ago. Photos and info later once it's fully up and running.

Desney finally finished the room on Saturday night and I knew Sunday morning we were finally going to be able to put the rack in and I was going to be able to start putting all of my equipment back in to one place. During the waiting period I had purchased a new rack-mounted Smart Gigabit switch and a new rack-mounted UPS both of which I have been dying to put in to place.

Desney helped me get the rack down the outside stairs and we relatively soon realised that even though it fit between the walls it wasn't going to fit down the stairs with the angles it had to go through. We then tried taking it upstairs, through the front door and down the back kitchen stairs. We had the same problem. It got stuck about half way down the stairs. I then had to accept that I was going to have to take it apart, take it downstairs in pieces and put it back together again in the computer room.

Sometime during all of this process my back started hurting. During one of these upstairs, downstairs, downstairs, upstairs manouvers I had pulled something in my lower back and it was getting worse and worse as time went by. But I had disconnected all of the network in the house and I knew I had to at least get everything plugged back in even if it was only temporary. I spent a few hours building the rack again as there were no directions and the pieces all got mixed up. I finally got it back together and it was time to start putting the equipment in it. By this time I couldn't even bend down let alone pick things up. I get Alexandra to come and help and I was able to get everything connected and up and running... I spent the rest of the evening in agony as I could no longer straighten up. I could only lift my back to a position whereby my back was parallel to the floor... no higher.

After a very uncomfortable evening of restless sleep I crawled out of bed, screaming in pain all by myself, and had a huddled-over shower and breakfast and headed down to my office. I knew that if I could just get in to my chair, and in front of my screens, I would be able to work. I couldn't go anywhere as we were expecting a delivery of a compost bin for the garden and I had to be here to receive it. The delivery arrived relatively early and I crawled up the stairs, let the man drop it off in the front yard and crawled back to my office.

I desperately called my chiropractor and was lucky to get an appointment for 16:30. I worked in my office, without moving, for the rest of the afternoon and took a taxi to the chiropractor's. He was more shocked by my new moustache and goatee than by my position. He can still remember seeing my like this years ago. We went through the symptoms and I was glad to learn that it wasn't my sciatica come back to haunt me. It was "only" a pulled ligament and classic lumbago. I couldn't move without yelping in pain so he gave me an injection of anti-inflammatories so he could at least do some placement work. He put everything back in place and I could miraculously stand up and walk. I was still hurting and sore. But I was upright again. I felt as though Ernest Angley had miraculously smacked my forehead and I was healed. He put a back belt on me, the same as I have at home but couldn't get on in the morning as I couldn't move, which held me in place. He prescribed a bunch of anti-inflammatories, muscle relaxants and pain killers and sent me home. He warned me that this wasn't over. I would need to wear the belt for a fortnight no matter how good I felt and I was going to feel worse before I felt better again. I have to avoid all "brusk" movements, can't lift anything, should stay horizontal or immobile as often as possible and on and on. The painful aspects are no alcohol for while I'm taking the anti-inflammatories and muscle (about 10 days) and no sex for about 5 days. Boring...

When I walked through the door I was in pain again. This was mostly due to sitting in bump and go traffic, in a taxi, for about an hour. I lied down, with a pillow between my legs, and was "ok" for dinner.

Today has been OK as I haven't had to move much... It's going to a long couple of weeks...

It ain't cancer but it's certainly a pain!

Our Alexandra the Journalist

Back in April Alexandra wrote to a magazine that she reads all the time, Geo Ado, to let them know that she is bilingual and would be interested in interviewing for their magazine. The magazine runs a monthly interview carried out by an adolescent. Of course who she really wanted to interview was Tokio Hotel. But apparently they had already been interviewed. Alexandra received an e-mail from the magazine at the end of the month and it was a bit of a shock for all of us. Apparently filming was on for a new movie with an adolescent lead and the journalist wanted Alexandra to come with her to Romania for a couple of days for the filming of The Seeker: The Dark is Rising. Needless to say Desney and I needed to check a few things out first. We met with the journalist personally at the magazine office and saw that everything was well organised and this was going to be an amazing opportunity for Alex. We ran out and got her the book, first in a series of 5 books, for her to read on the trip and off she went.

This was the first few days of May. I was in New York while she was away. When I got back I got to hear all of her wonderful stories about her adventure. We then started our months of waiting for the magazine to come out with her interview. On November 1st, yesterday, the magazine hit the newstands.

The magazine had already sent us an electronic copy of Alex' pages, so as to see exactly what her pages look like in the magazine, a couple of weeks ago and we had to keep quiet about it. It's a 2 megabyte Acrobat file but it shows everything.

Then we received our subscriber's copy of the magazine last Thursday and Alex was able to bring it to school to show everyone on Friday just before the holidays started. Now it's on the streets!

As of yesterday, and until the end of the month, the Geo Ado web site has the interview, and Alex' photo, right on the home page. As the site will only last a month I've captured everything to an Acrobat file for permanent storage.

As you can imagine we'll be buying a few copies of the magazine today and we'll all be gloating and kvelling around the world for quite some time.

Bravo Alexandra!!!

Still cancer free after all these years!

As my loyal readers may remember I went in for my second annual PET Scan on October 2nd.

Here in France the results take about 10 days and they send them directly to the doctor who prescribed the scan. Therefore the results should have been sent to my ENT (ORL in French) specialist around October 14th. I therefore start getting nervous around October 16th.

The way things work in the doctors' minds is radically different than how it works in us cancer patients' minds. In the doctor's mind he will call the patient if the results show a problem which needs immediate treatment or verifying as something needs to be done. However if the results show everything's clear well... then... there's no need calling the patient right? On the other side the cancer patient, me, is sitting here nervously waiting confirmation and reassurance that the cancer has not come back somewhere else in my body. The doctor has no idea how important that tiny bit of reassurance is. He has no idea that, as a survivor, I live with the constant, not quite omnipresent but regular, abject fear that the cancer is going to come back. It was such a surprise in the first place that I am constantly suspicious that it will come back and I will not know about it. Probably the most debilitating handicap cancer survivors have to live with is psychological and emotional: we live with the eternal fear that it may come back.

After quite a few days of waiting and getting more and more anxious I finally called his office two days ago (25/10) and left a message asking if he had received the results. He has a new assistant so I had to explain what a PET scan was, that it involved cancer, and how important it was that I get a reply. I then called again yesterday (26/10) and left a message. I hoped that my annoying persistence would get through to the receptionist that this was important to me. I sent an e-mail to my (wonderful) general practitioner last night.

At 20:30 last night my ENT called me and faintly apologised with the standard explanation that if there was any problem he would have called me immediately. He told me all of the results were negative. Just like last year I had that momentary heart skip of negative... that's not positive... that's not good. Then I asked for confirmation and he reassured me that they found nothing and everything is fine. He offered to fax me the results. I explained I don't need to see the medical information, this time, I simply needed those simple words: "there is no cancer anywhere in your body at this time".

TOUT va bien. I can relax a bit with the reassurance that my body is cancer free and I can make some plans longer than a couple of weeks ahead with the notion that I will not be stopping everything to start long and obligatory cancer treatments again any time real soon.

WHEW!

Life is good.

Kiva

KIVA

THIS is what the Internet should be about: one-to-one assistance.

Kiva is microfinancing and microloaning. An entrepreneur or tiny business in need of money, generally in an underdeveloped country, requests a loan. We lenders each loan a portion of that amount directly. Once the necessary amount is raised the loan is sent to the recipient who uses it to develop their business or activity and they pay it back in installments to Kiva. Kiva then distributes the money back to the lenders.

Absolutely everyone wins in this situation: tiny businesses and individuals who would generally not be able to obtain this sort of loan from a "normal" financial institution get the money they need and they pay back in reasonable installments; lenders participate in helping individuals and businesses around the world AND lenders get their money back over time; Kiva, who do not take a cut or a percentage on the actual loan, receive donations from the lenders throughout the process.

Microloans and microfinancing: A win-win way of doing business and feeling good about business at the same time.

Big banks beware!

MY LENDER'S PAGE

Cancer Vixen

I was watching LCI this morning while having breakfast and they were interviewing Marisa Acocella Marchetto for her book Cancer Vixen which was translated to "Cancer in the City" as I'm sure the French had difficulty with the word vixen. The story behind the book and the author herself was quite interesting and I went Googling through the Net to find out more. A successful New York fashion victim cartoon artist, about to get married for the first time at the age of 43, is diagnosed with breast cancer. Her outtake and outlook on the entire experience is excellent and I can relate.

I ordered the book immediately from Amazon. But I was amazed to find what I believe to be a large part of the book, if not all of the book itself, published on the web on the The First Post site. I'm not sure why but one can read a large portion of the book directly on the site with all of the artwork and such. For whatever reason I appreciate it and it's wonderful!

I highly recommend what I've read so far to just about anyone. I particularly appreciate the comments on her web site where she mentions her next book which is, as she says "thankfully", NOT about cancer. We all move on...

Sell A Band

equation - Chilly in Paris'- on SellaBand

I found this one while listening to one of my regular podcasts of Digital Planet: What a brilliant idea! Yet another excellent use of the Internet and microfunding. Musicians and performers (Artists) present their stuff on the site (songs and sometimes videos) in the hope of earning $50,000 to go in to the studio and record. Once they're reached the magic amount they are provided with an A&R person and a producer and a recording studio and they make their CD. Afterwards the CD is sold online, 3 songs are available for free downloads and the rest of the individual songs are also sold as downloadable files. The profits for the sales of the CDs and the sales of the song downloads are split amongst the Artists, SellABand and the Believers.

Believers (you and I) purchase "parts" of the $50,000 fund for an artists at a rate of $10 per part (therefore 5,000 parts). In return the believer will receive a limited edition copy of the CD, a portion of the sales profits based on their number of parts and, most importantly, participates in the development, marketing and discovery of new artists. In most cases the Artists actually send some form of existing CD or demo CD to their believers as soon as they buy some parts so the believer doesn't have to wait until the Artist reaches the magic amount.

Sell A Band provides all sorts of tools for promoting the artists on believers' web sites, e-mails and such.

I became a believer right away and you can find my believer's page. After spending some time listening to various artists on the site, which I must say was both a lot of fun and quite enlightening, I became a believer of the group Equation which I quite enjoy. I then went to their web site and downloaded lots of their live music as MP3 files. I uploaded those music files on to our home music server and have been listening to them over and over again for quite some time know. Hypnotic. They then sent me a demo CD with a few live tracks and even a few videos of their live performances which I have also uploaded on to our server so we can watch them on the living room television and on the other computers in the house. I have become a big fan.

I must say it's a wonderful and unique opportunity to be able to communicate directly with the musicians themselves about their music, their performances, their goals, their message, their dreams and to feel like an active part in the experience. In some ways it's similar to the Salon des Vignerons Indépendants, which we attend regularly and loyally, where one gets to communicate directly with the winemaker bypassing all of the various levels of the distribution process.

There are some wondefully positive things the Internet can provide to the world and this is one of them!

Second Viddler video

This is my second Viddler video and certainly last for the day. I really should be working...

This one was recorded through my MacBook Pro just for testing and playing around with a bit of tech.

Does anyone know what the verb is for video blogging? Vlogging? Vidogging? V-Blogging?

Viddler

I found the Viddler site through my following iJustine in my regular visits through Twitter. I actually visit both Twitter and Facebook several times throughout the day as well as updating them both through the web or through my phone.

Viddler looks like fun and it was incredibly easy to start using. Below is my first Viddler video and I'm going to now try and record another one from my Mac to test out how it works on another platform.

Do I really have time for this? No way. Is it fun? Definitely. Should I be doing this right now? That's debatable. But technological exploration is my life!

Does this have anything whatsoever to do with Cancer? No.

Is there more to life than Cancer? Damn straight!

Viddler

My first Viddler video. We'll see if, and how, this thing works....

Scarface - 2 years later

I had scheduled myself to do this on September 26th, 2006... but I had computer problems and then network problems and then my webcam broke and ...

This shot is to show off my scar 2 years after the surgery. The goal is to show the evolution of the scar which is especially of interest to others who may, unfortunately, have to go through the same type of procedure.

This photo shows my scar on my neck as of today (October 8th, 2006).


This photo, on the right, shows my scar from 2 years ago just after taking the bandages off. It comes from my blog entry of September 26th, 2005. Quite a few things have changed since that photo not least of which is that I have aged 2 years; I have changed webcams which shows a noticeable difference in quality (I now have a Logitech QuickCam Ultra Vision which I am quite pleased with); I have changed spectacles which is not quite as noticeable although the news ones have progressive lens thanks to a combination of age and (mostly) the effects of high neck radiation thereapy on the back of the eyes... add to all of this the fact that I need a haircut and a shave and you can still analyse the difference between the 2 photos and the 2 periods.

I am quite pleased to see that the scar has significantly faded since the beginning and the colouring has changed from a rather noticeable brownish red to a hopefully more subtle redish brown. It's certainly still noticeable but I feel it is a lot less "in your face". The other difference I notice, both visually and physically, is that the scar has receded in to my throat/neck over time and it pulls on the skin surrounding the scar as I move. This causes a sort of pull every now and then, and extremely rarely a slight spasm of pain, but it rarely bothers me and throat pain has become quite relative to me in the past 2 years.

It's interesting to follow the evolution of the scar as this is certainly the most noticeable aspect of my cancer. I like to think that if the scar wasn't up on my throat and ears that most people would not even know that there was anything different about me in comparison to most people... disregarding my other personal excenticitries and unique quirks of fashion and expression.

;-)

My Second Annual PET Scan

Having scheduled it several weeks ago I knew that today was going to be my second annual PET scan. I can still remember my first PET Scan quite well.

I woke up late as I knew I wasn't going to be able in the morning. But I made this appointment much earlier than the previous one (09:45 this time) so that I could basically get up, shower and go.

I plugged the address in Sarcelles in to my GPS and headed off. Last year I left myself an hour to get there and it only took 20 minutes. This year I left myself a half an hour and there was, of course, an accident on the autoroute and then road construction on the side streets. I arrived about 15 minutes late having been stuck for about 10 minutes only 400 metres away from the centre.

The rest was now ordinary: a bit of paperwork, a 5-minute visit with a doctor who this time only asked if anything had changed since last time, sit in the waiting room for about a half an hour and then off for the procedure. As I walked in to the examining room I realised how much I do not miss these medical centres which I now only have to go to rarely in comparison to going daily just a couple of years ago. The nurse was very kind to remind me to go to the toilet beforehand, which made me feel like a 6-year old boy, as I would be lying down for over an hour and a half without moving. She then took some blood from my finger and put in the intravenous distributor in my elbow.

I was then put in a bed to lie down. The nurse comes back in, this time with a lead protection jacket on, and injects the "product" in to me while saying "this won't hurt or feel hot" and such niceties and I'm saying to myself "If this is so inocuous why are you wearing a lead protection jacket and I'm half naked being shot up with whatever it is you're being protected from?". I'm then told to remain horizontal for at least an hour. Things started going a bit downhill for the centre from this point forward. For me it was easy as I basically drifted off in to sleep as I had only slept about 4 or 5 hours the night before. But I could still hear the discussions around me. One woman was just plain being difficult and then started crying about how no one cares about her and on and on. I could relate but didn't really want to hear about it when we were all trying to relax and prepare for our turn. Then it turns out that they were having problems with the scanner itself. They stopped injecting new patients. But those of us who had already been injected were going to have to wait. Each scan normally takes about 20 minutes but they were now taking about an hour. I lay there just waiting.

Finally it was my turn. Off with the watch, eyeglasses, trousers and earring. I was then placed in the, now all to familiar, scan tunnel and had my arms put in to position (above my head) and my neck and hip placed. I was then told to not move during the procedure which "should normally" last 20 minutes. I asked "normally?" and the nurse explained they were having issues with the equipment this morning and that it may take longer. Laying in one position without moving at all for over 20 minutes is not fun. As I was slowly rolled out from the tunnel I was told I was one of the lucky ones as my scan "only" took 30 minutes. I thought to myself: "you should lie down in there without moving for 'only' 30 minutes and see how 'lucky' you feel!"

For an exam that was supposed to cut out about 3 or 4 hours of my day I didn't get out of there until well past 3 and headed home to eat and drink a bit.

Now comes the hard part... they send the results to my doctor in about 10 days and I spend the interim period waiting, waiting and waiting...

Incandescent vs CFL vs LED lights

I haven't written in a while... but this is just a little something that struck me today:

a comparison between incandescent, CFL and LED light bulbs.

Although the LED bulbs use 94% less electricity than the incandescent bulb they also give off 93% less light. But those CFL bulbs look pretty amazing in these tests. I'm willing to give up 5% to 6% of light (800 lumens instead of 850) to use 78% less electricity (13.94 watts instead of 62.87)!

We hope to start testing the CFL bulbs around our house sometime soon... I'm sure I'll mention it here...

Yet another medical exam

The morning I left for Switzerland (last Wednesday) I went in for blood and urine tests. I had also booked my appointment for today's "echography" (sonography?) of my bladder and prostate. As I mentioned in my entry as regards my doctor's appointment I lately have moments when I have to go pee right away and can't hold it in very well. Dr. Girard therefore sent me off for "la totale" of tests to see if it was a chemical problem, an organ problem or, God forbid, the cancer coming back somewhere else. As he said we will always have to be on the look out for that. I therefore have spent the days since our appointment with yet another worry...

The blood and urine results looked good so it's not a chemical problem. Unfortunately, in my medically ignorant mind, that made me believe it was more likely a problem with the actual organs and more likely the dreaded cancer coming back.

I loved the conflict of the exam... I was having this exam because I have difficulty holding my water. When I made the appointment for the exam they knew this and their response was that I need to not urinate for an hour before the exam. At all. I explained how difficult that was going to be... anyway I made it...

The bladder echography was easy and he let me pee right afterwards. He said everything was fine with my bladder from what he could see. So now I'm extra worried I've got prostate cancer or something. To top it off he puts on the rubber gloves and hits me with "Mr. Erb you were informed that the prostate echography is done internally n'est-ce pas ?" Um... for some reason no one had mentioned that to me. So now I go from having cameras shoved up my nose and down my throat to having a camera, within a rod which looked to me like a male homosexual's large vibrator, shoved up my ass. Oh well...

In the end, and this is truly the moment to use that term, the results were perfectly fine. My prostate's fine as well.

Basically the problem, at the moment, appears to be that I just drink too much water and too regularly. I wonder if other throat cancer survivors have the same problem. It's a standard cause and effect relationship: drink lots of liquids and you're gonna pee alot and often.

I guess that it was all good news...

Now it's back to the doctor to see if there's anything to do knowing that it isn't a major problem...

Harry Potter VII

Got up relatively early for me on a Saturday and I was out of the house by about 9:45 and off to La Défense.

I got there at 10:05 just after the opening of the stores...

I was heading for FNAC as I knew they would have what I had come looking for. However when I got to the top of the escalator out of the parking lot right in front of me was Virgin Megastore and their entire entrance was devoted to the new release...

I ran in and took 3 copies of the shelves (1 for me, 1 for Alexandra and 1 for Jessica) and then got sucked in to the store... it's absolutely enormous! I strolled around for a while. I had the books in my hands so I had nothing to worry about. I ended up buying a whole bunch of magazines (digital stuff, computer stuff, stereo and audiofile sutff, ...) and by the time I got to the cash registers there were queues everywhere.

But it was really funny to see so many people with the book in their hands... some adults were literally trying to hide the book while they were in the queue hoping no one would notice what they were buying...

I left the stored with 3 copies, got to the car and back home by 11:00.

At 11:15 I started reading Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (aka Harry Potter VII). Please leave me alone for a few days as it's going to take me a while to get through over 600 pages...